Most of us probably grew up as kids with what I would consider a “joy-based approach to eating.” What I mean by this is that most of our food decisions were made with little to no thought, were primarily chosen based on what would satisfy us, and despite all of this our nutritional needs were largely if not fully met. If you were like me when you were younger, you didn’t know in detail what protein, fat, and carbohydrate are, you didn’t feel bad for eating “too much ice cream,” and you probably ate 3 relatively balanced meals and at least 2-3 snacks each day. How did eating, something so fundamental to sustaining human life, become so complicated for so many of us as we got older? And are we any better off for it?
The opposite of a joy-based approach to eating is what I would consider a fear-based approach to eating. A fear-based approach to eating is one that is rooted in guilt, fear, and shame, and leads to obsession and chaos. Unfortunately, this is what many of us develop in varying degrees as teenagers or adults. Living in a culture in which we are constantly inundated with messages about what is beautiful (i.e., one body size – very thin), what and what not to eat, and what new diet or exercise regimen to try can leave many of us feeling confused and obsessive when it comes to food and nutrition. We may start to become very black and white about food, labeling some foods “safe” or “healthy,” and other foods “off-limits” or “bad.” We may develop rigid food rules and shame ourselves when we break them. To pay the penance for our “mistakes” with eating, we may resort to dieting, shaming ourselves, obsessively exercising, or other unhealthy measures to remove the guilt we feel and the fear of gaining weight. I don’t think I’m exaggerating when I say that the way some of us interact with food is like a religion – I can say that because I have been there! Rigid rules, efforts to remove guilt and essentially internally cleanse oneself, and the reality that it is never enough no matter our best efforts. If any of this resonates with you, know that you are not alone.
While I could go on about what it is like to live in a fear-based approach to food, I will save that for another time. Today I want to focus more on two facets of a joy-based approach to eating:
- Why is it important to have a joy-based approach to eating?
- How can one rediscover a joy-based approach to eating?
Let’s look at these questions one at a time.
