When I think of what generally causes a person (such as myself) to feel overwhelmed by any sort of big goal or desired end result, there are often two key aspects that can cause overwhelm:

(1) the nature or difficulty of the goal itself, and

(2) how we are approaching the goal mentally and emotionally (regardless of its actual objective difficulty).

Overwhelm Source #1: The nature or difficulty of the goal (recovery) itself.

From an objective standpoint, recovering from anorexia is a very challenging process. There is a reason recovery rates are so grim. (BUT that does NOT need to be the case for you!)

There is the obvious physical/nutritional health component. This may include things like:

• The often extreme GI discomfort (and unpleasant related symptoms) of the GI system getting used to more food
• The challenges of extreme hunger as the body “re-awakens” from its starved state and is desperately needing ALL THE FOOD NOW
• Working on balancing and healing hormones and the gut
• The COPIOUS amounts of food that need to be eaten to achieve said weight gain (*cue head spinning*)

So much more could be said, but suffice it to say for the purposes of this post that weight restoration / overall bodily healing is often very uncomfortable from a purely physical standpoint.

Thinking about the mental/emotional components of the weight restoration process, there are a number of (even more) challenging aspects. This may include things like:

• The emotional challenges of tolerating weight gain, fears with food, & uncertainty with your body
• Feeling disgust and even hatred toward your body
• Not knowing when this is all going to be over
• Feeling a loss of control & heightened overall anxiety

We can also dig deeper and think about the “bigger picture” dynamics that are (emotionally-speaking) driving the eating disorder at a more root-cause level. This involves facing deep emotional pain and core wounds (such as fear of failure, rejection, abandonment, never feeling good enough, not feeling accepted, etc.). (The million dollar question: What key unmet emotional needs are you trying to meet through your eating disorder?) 

Overwhelm Source #2: How you are approaching the goal of recovery mentally and emotionally. 

While we have already established that recovery is difficult in and of itself, we can create greater overwhelm for ourselves due to how we are approaching recovery (mentally and emotionally). This source of overwhelm will be the main focus of the rest of this blog post.

If there is anything I have learned from pursuing big goals, whether that is my own recovery journey or (more recently) starting and growing my business, it is that MINDSET and how we are approaching the goal EMOTIONALLY is (at least) half the battle.

If you are feeling overwhelmed by the process of recovery (and, who isn’t most of the time??), I hope these 5 tips help you with your RECOVERY MINDSET and EMOTIONAL approach.

5 Tips for When Anorexia Recovery Feels Overwhelming: 

Focus on one day (or one meal or snack) at a time.

It can be easy to feel overwhelmed and discouraged if you are constantly focusing on HOW LONG recovery “is going to take,” or HOW MUCH FARTHER you “have to go.” (I put these things in quotes because we don’t know how long recovery is going to take you… and that also depends on how you define “recovery.”)

This is sort of like glass-half-empty type of thinking, focusing on the negatives (what you haven’t “yet done” in recovery, how much weight you haven’t yet gained, etc.) instead of all that you HAVE worked through so far.

Instead of feeling despair about how much longer you might be in the recovery process, I encourage clients to zero in on each DAY at a time. Or, within in a day, focusing on each meal or snack at a time. These daily “moments” of pursuing recovery WILL add up over time to the overall GOAL of being recovered.

Keep your vision and reasons for recovery in mind as much as possible.

While I don’t think it is helpful to dwell on the entire process of recovery (see point above), I do think it is helpful to keep your vision and goals for recovery in mind as much as humanly possible.

What ultimately is going to motivate you to keep persevering in the challenges of recovery, day after day and month after month? These can’t be “other people’s reasons” (such as those of your parents). Why do YOU want to recover? Or, why does part of you want to recover?

Eating disorders are feisty beasts that do their very best to convince us that we don’t actually want to recover, and that staying in the eating disorder is actually better. Part of the work of recovery is learning to separate yourself from this voice and let your true, healthy self grow stronger.

In order to sustain your recovery process, you need to inundate your mind with your reasons WHY.

View recovery as a puzzle, and expect that it will be a journey of many “ups” and “downs”. 

Often, with a challenging goal such as recovery, there can be months of “seemingly little to no visible progress.” Clients may tell me they feel like they are “failing” in recovery if they aren’t gaining weight as fast as they’d like, if they are struggling to follow their meal plans, or if they lost a few pounds.

THIS IS NOT FAILURE.

So much of the “progress” of recovery is working through all of the challenges that will then actually enable your weight restoration and long-term mental/emotional healing.

Progress and growth in recovery is continuing to come to nutrition counseling and therapy appointments to work through things openly and honestly, regardless of the “current tangible outcomes.” As an RD, I don’t see “lack of tangible results” as “failure to progress” in recovery.

Real recovery involves putting the right puzzle pieces together to allow for greater “results” in your recovery down the line. Puzzle pieces like finding a good dietitian, therapist, and support system. There is so much “background” and “behind the scenes” work to recovery that IS part of the growth process and that will enable you to restore weight and heal your relationship with food and your body (so that you can feel at peace in your body / maintain said weight restoration).

Recovery is NOT a linear process. It is a journey of many zigzags, back and forths, ups and downs. BUT, each perceived “down” is an opportunity for GROWTH and continual “assembly” of your puzzle pieces for healing.

Focus each day on who you are BECOMING.

Again, with any important and meaningful goal, it can be easy to overly fixate on the end result. Another mindset shift that can be helpful is to instead try to focus your attention each day on who you are BECOMING as a person.

In the day by day process of recovering from anorexia, you are becoming someone who does NOT give up even when it feels overwhelming, or when it feels like the tempting or “easy” thing to do would be to go back to your eating disorder.

You are becoming increasingly strong and resilient. You are becoming someone who works through challenges, who finds creative solutions, and who is willing to grow psychologically and emotionally in order to recover.

These are all characteristics that will serve you well for your entire life… One of the blessings in disguises from walking through something as difficult as anorexia recovery.

Know that you CAN and WILL recover if you are committed to doing whatever it takes, for as long as it takes… and know that it will all be worth it 100x over. 

Recovery is fully possible for anyone. If you are committed to working through the challenges of recovery – and there will be plenty of challenges – you can and will recover.

Even if you are reading this post and don’t feel “committed to doing whatever it takes” and aren’t even sure if you want to recover, if you are committed to working through THIS mindset challenge, that is a promising sign.

If you’ve found yourself struggling with the grips of anorexia, you are likely by nature a very strong and determined person. Figuring out how to channel that resilience, strength, and determination into the healing and recovery process will serve you well in making a full recovery.

Recovery, while challenging, is FULLY WORTH IT. To be frank, option (1) is to continue on with your eating disorder, missing out on so much of the joy and beauty that life has to offer. Option (2) is to channel your strength and determination into making a full recovery, going on to live the rest of your life WITHOUT the need for your eating disorder. Not only will you be free from your eating disorder, you will be a much stronger, emotionally aware, psychologically resilient, and empathetic person as a result.

Other posts you might find helpful:

10 Thoughts About Anorexia Recovery (From Personal Experience)
Rediscover a Joy-Based Approach to Eating
Trade-Offs in the Pursuit of “Perfect” Food Choices